Cord, also very brave. I agree with Tia Williams, both of these essays should be published in the New Yorker.

I only learned this year that asking someone their race is inappropriate. I'm in grade 12! I am shamefaced. But I didn't know it was inane because people ask me where I'm from all the time. Then I thought it was kind of like how everyone asks each other what they got on their test. Stupid, but common. Now I know it is actually worse. Thank you for finally informing me.
PS
The picture on the second page is so cute, it's painful. Probably because your heart literally grows.

Cord…I am from Trinidad where everyone knows wha I am. Here in the States, I get "What ARE you?" questions constantly. (Uh….Human?)

I can definitely relate and applaud you for sharing this. Even more… I so love you for sharing that picture of a young Cord poppin his Izod collar.

Oh Cord! Once again, an example of how similar we all are despite our life journey. I had the lovely distinction of a kid spitting on my locker and writing "nigger" all over it in high school. As you so aptly put it, you're just walking around minding your business when all of a sudden someone is calling you out for being different, and not in a positive way. I think you are "black enough" and by "black enough" I mean, you have suffered the same social injustices that a lot of other people have suffered - black, brown, red, yellow, etc.

I once made this comment on Mollygood "wait…Cord is black?!"

oops.

So refreshing to hear someone has experienced what I have. My father is white and native american and my mother creole and american indian. You know, my concept of race was completely changed when I went to Rio. It was mind blowing to see people who look like me and I left with the feeling that I belonged to the race of mankind…until I came back to the US.

Yea! Awkward conversationalists. Great piece.

Thanks for sharing, Cord.

Hey Cord, as woman who heard that same nonsense being one a handful of black kids growing up in Santa Monica/Malibu area (80's), I feel you. The white kids talk crap, the black kids who think you're "acting white" talk crap.
Funny thing is when I lived in Germany they all thought I was Brazilian..lol.

You know who and what you are. A good human being. No one can take that from you.
Cute photo!

you are definitely too black!

and you're in love with yourself.

1995: a white classmates wonders aloud what my lips feel like (yes, they are thick) and proceeds to TOUCH THEM! WTF

Yeah, I feel you. I am A.A., mixed with N.A and white and my husband is white. But, where we live everyone assumes my kids are Puerto Rican and constantly speak spanish to us when we are out and about.

Great post. I'm Filipino, but my husband is black and I often wonder about what my future kids are going to go through and I don't doubt its going to be similar to your experience. My church mom, who is black, believes that black folks are more accepting of people of other races, since blacks have been rejected by so many, but the black woman who shot me dirty looks as I walked next to my husband in Florida didn't get that memo.

Thanks for this post. It was great!

"Can I touch your hair?"

–CLASSIC!!!! LOL

I get that ALL THE TIME, I'm Belizean by the way. (Meaning I'm from the country of Belize, in Central America, since most Americans don't know SHIT about geography! )

Thanks for writing this Cord, STAY UP BROTHA!!!!

"cord, are you a self absorbed pretentious emo?" "Yeah, I think I am."

Someone today called me a "ginger" - which I did not realize was a semi-derogatory name for someone with red hair and freckles.

Not as powerful a word, sure, but come on. Why the name-calling?

I think a lot more people than we all realize can identify with being called out for who they are.

So you've been discriminated against, by blacks and by whites altogether. That's an experience no child should have to go through, and some of the things that have been said to you really make me angry and sad.

Now, given your first hand experience with racism and segregation, how can you still be a bigoted french basher, as you've proven many time on MG? That's beyond me.

Hey Cord,

I was the one (the only one, I noticed, after I went back and checked) who asked if you were black that first day. Didn't mean to "ask to touch your hair", so to speak. I was just curious about your racial make-up and it had nothing to do with your qualifications to contribute to this site. I just couldn't look at you and tell, right off. Black people aren't the only ones who have "black interests”. I wasn’t trying to be a clod. I'm often asked about my own race (mistaken for Latin all the time. If I had a penny for every time someone walked up to me speaking Spanish…) and never took offense to it. We haven't shared the same negative experiences, so I can't say I feel your pain, but after reading your post, I definitely understand why you took offense.

I wondered why you never answered me that day and why Lauren made some comment about "doesn't his last name tell you what he is?" My last name is Greek, so what does that prove? Anyway, woo woo woo, didn't mean to dreg up all those ugly memories from your past.

But now you've got me wondering, is it all the fucked up stuff that happened to you that make you feel "black enough"?

I truly enjoyed reading this, normally I skim everything. I am full Hispanic, but am always asked ,"what are you?" Apparently, I look Filipino to Korean to Indian to Native American… so it is quite awkward to see all the question marks on people's expressions.

No matter what propelled you to write this piece, I am glad you shared your life experience.

This was a great read Cord. Sometimes I wish I knew what my heritage is but I know its not something that really matters. You are treated a certain way because of how you look anyway.

I'm a white female who has always dated black men and has always had only black female friends and I have heard all the rude comments, gotten all the dirty looks, etc….and now I have a son who I hope will not be subjected to all that nonsense. I really appreciated this piece though, I know that I have to talk to my son about these things, I want to send him out there prepared for the world and all the good and bad it brings, he already knows he's a little different already but right now he loves it….he thinks he's the greatest….and he does not like to be referred to as black or white….you ask him and he'll tell you the truth….he's brown.

I loved reading this.
Your experience is so accessible…It's art.

I am haitian-american and I cant say I had the same treatment from black people as you did, but I always feel like people inherently want to dissect and disregard whats different from them, even if they are not different from them. I went to all black schools during my childhood and I would be called white girl because I listened to Punk music and was a bit odd, but I HAD NO WHITE FRIENDS BECAUSE I WENT TO AN ALL BLACK SCHOOL!!!! Even when everybody looks similar, somebody has to find something wrong with you and point it out!

You're the best, kid. You're the fucking best.

Thank you, Cord! As a 21 year-old woman with an African-American father and Puerto Rican-Taino Native American mother, I have been called the "N" word, referred to a "fucking Black whore" and at 13, asked countless times if my nephew (who's mother was a very grown woman at the time) if he was my baby and if I have others. Yet I've been dealt the "white" comment by pretty much everyone because I haven't let the ghetto turn me into a hood rat. Thanks, Cord, for not preaching but sharing with us your experiences. I feel it's an inspiration to long-suffering "mutts" or just people (White, Asian, Middle Eastern, etc.) in general who don't fit the stereotypes.

You have it, Cord. That was one beautiful piece. Both parents are black and Asian.
When I get a "you don't look black, you don't sound black"; I always say "but I am, therefore YOU should adjust your limited view of blackness".

I a really uncomfortable here, in the US, I have had more racist (and sexist) comments thrown at me in 8 months here, that I have had my entire life in Canada and the UK.

You should really submit your piece to the NYTimes or the New Yorker.

Of course Cord's black, his last name is Jefferson!

DUH!

Just kidding!

Cord, have a plate of my Mama's rice and beans.

these are the type of testimonials that should be published widely. To be such a diverse country there is still so much misunderstanding and harbored hatred.

Thanks for that Cord!

I appreciate this.

thanks again, Cord for sharing.

BTW, I am a brown skinned obviously black chic and I just love my folks =-) Gaining perspective on your life experience, helps me to understand perhaps why you can sometimes speak with a sense of detachment from issues I perceive as sensitive.

What's an "archetypal African American"?

You just passed up all that bullshit, and showed that your are man enough!! Because when it's all said and done, that's all that matters.
Love you- Trey

I have to say I got what you meant when you say "I am black and so much more" I say "and" as "but" could suggest shame or a need to counter "blackness" to some.
I think it is great to acknowledge one's blackness and know that "blackness" itself, especially for African-Americans, and many others in the African Diaspora includes all the various ancestry from Europe, Native peoples and other immigrating groups in our heritage.
As an African-American who has West African, Celtic-American heritage (a given for 99.9% A-As), I often get "oh, so you're JUST black?" from West-Indian, Latino & white friends/colleagues. And in response to their inherit view as black as less, I say "yep and it's JUST GREAT!"
There's no need to justify our blackness or "black experience. It's an all-inclusive deal

People always think that America is the greatest country but its not the easiest to grow up in, I love my country Jamaica because no one really pays attention to those things, I mean we do have problems with people being prejudice but not for the most part. some things that happened to you would not happen to me, Im not looked down on because my friends have a different complexing from me, in fact with my closest friends all 4 of us are different shades of black but that has nevaer affected us in any way and i hope it never will, I think our motto sums up every thing " OUT OF MANY ONE PEOPLE"

A man, you could not have picked a better picture? I loved that blue teri-cloth zip-up jacket! You have one again proven why we are what we are! Once a Jefferson: forever misunderstood.

Wrong picture, but still…
love you

Cord is a Rainbow

I get people wanting to touch my hair all the time– for my Cory Matthews hair. Seriously though, great essay!

Sorry to break it to you Cord, you are not black. You can't relate to Spike Lee Joints thus I will STEP on your Jordans all day. Then, I will blast that 'hip hop ish' out my boom box therefore f-ing up you and your BKLYN hipster friends lil beauty sleep…ONE

@jerine: "Out of many, one people." yeah we got that too, on our money. i.e. "e plurubus unum," but i don't think too many people follow it.

seriously. what do you and lauren want? a galleta? a cookie for internal questioning of, "Am I Black Enough?" Negro and Half-Negro, please.

Cord–a more interesting dynamic to explore–in your timeline, where are you romantic experiences with Black women? Why are they absent from your "color chronology"?

I personally love when people ask me what I am or where I am from. Why is that offensive? People praise diversity and want to be cool by living in cities full of culture and so forth. So why is it offensive to ask someone where they are from or what their ethnicity is? Why is it wrong to notice that someone might have an accent, suggesting that they are not from around here and has the potential to have a great story or two? Why is it wrong to have others curious about unique features? I want people to ask me questions like those, it means they notice. I prefer to stand out in a crowd.

I have a son who is 9: black, italian, and some mystery mix. He has yet to have someone use his skin tone against him in conversation. He smiles when people tell him that his skin/hair/eyes are pretty. He likes when people assume that he is good at basketball just because he is tall and then are shocked to find out that he started reading before he was 2 and is in the gifted program at school. I think he actually enjoys defying the stereotype.

I loved going to his school functions as a 23 yo unmarried mom to a mixed kid and getting to tell everyone that I had a degree in molecular biology and seeing the surprised looks on their faces.

Your essay was very well written and honest. I can't help but think that most of the population would have loved to be in your shoes over those years: traveling abroad, living in different parts of the country, going to college, etc.

You make me feel like such a loser when I come to this site and read this…after wasting 10 minutes reading the crap on perezhilton. What does it mean when a site like his gets 89 gazillion hits a day and a site like this doesn't? You are WONDERFUL.

Well, Angela, I don't mind when someone I know at least decently well asks me what I am (mixed Black West Indian and Near/Middle-Eastern here) but when you're just meeting someone? It always upsets me that someone would ask me what my ethnic background is, before they know anything at all about who I am, what motivates me, what I care about, etc.

Thanks to Cord for sharing. I can relate!

When I was younger I got the "pubes" comments about my hair, and then I was ashamed of it and kept it short. A few years out of high school, however, and I no longer wanted to "fit in" with that racist environment, and decided to grow my hair.

It's long and locked now, but there was a time in there when it was just before locking when I'd get several comments a week, including at least a couple of people asking if they could touch it. I get some if it still but I suppose having locks somehow makes people less likely to ask that (either they have negative prejudices or they're just less curious because it's more common, who knows)

As a man, I actually don't mind it that much and I let people touch my hair when they ask. I think of it as community service — letting crazy ignorant white folk know that African hair, left natural, can easily be clean, strong, healthy, and beautiful. I could see how some people would feel objectified by it, however, and I would totally support anyone and everyone getting pissed about people asking to touch their hair (and I hope I'm not setting others back by saying 'go for it!')

"…though I am not by birth an archetypal African American…"

You're not?

Actually you are. Most "African-American" are the exact blend: Black, White, Red. Not as unique as you or Tiger Woods make it seem.

One last question.

You look like a black man to me, where did this confusion come from regarding your ethnic identity? I would especially expect black people to know what another black person looks like. Bizarre!

I'm a little embarassed by the "swarthy Italian man" who peppered you with insults. Southern Italians (my own family included) can be incredibly racist, partly because the rest of Europe considered them non-white and low-class. We're like the rednecks of Europe! This was always ridiculous to me because history and genetics both prove there was significant mixing with North Africans in the not-too-distant past.

I ask about people's ethnicities (once I get to know them) all the time because I'm a historian. I think the most fascinating stories in history are the journeys our individual ancestors took that brought them together and created our genetic makeup. I know it's not the safest question, but I try to make my innocent intentions clear. Once in a while I step on a landmine and someone gets upset. Just remember that curious and a little dumb isn't the same as racist.

Also, I think this apparent desire for white people to touch black people's hair has its roots (no pun intended) in something far older than race. There is some primordial need to touch things that look touchable. That girl in my class with the perfect afro can't stop touching her hair, either. I can't blame her- it's fascinatingly soft and bouncy-looking and so perfectly round…I'm drawn to it…

I thought about it, and analyzed what you said. It would appear that any insults you received about your "ethnic" make-up from whites had to do with your physical appearance. However, any disparaging remarks blacks made about you being a "white boy" merely came from you not fitting the black paradigm. Those sentiments had nothing to do with who you are "racially" and much more to do with who you are socially. I've experienced the same remarks about being white, and I proudly identify as a brown skinned black person. Just a thought, I could be wrong.

Your writing is provocative, passionate and poignant; I want to be like you when I grow up (but, I think I may be older than you).

I could relate to this in so many ways, despite the fact that I'm fully black (Nigerian to be exact). Living in a predominantly "white" area, I was one of six blacks in my grade in elementary school (I was the "pet African). Upon reaching middle school and high school, I encountered more blacks that came from other parts of town. I remember my classmates calling me "white boy" and I responding "B****, my folks are from Africa, the source of black people." I remember sitting in class, and my white & asian friends would say, "dude, you're not black… you're one of us, but darker." Now that I think about it, I guess I took it as a compliment, becuz I didn't fit the "black" stereotype (a stereotype that most African immigrants don't identify with) . But now I'm in college, it offends me. It's as if they're disassociating "success/intelligence" from "being black." But enough about me…. lol.

Honestly… even if you weren't black, this blog is great. It touches many issues amongst the black community. Keep doin what u do.

thanks for sharing your story and the pictures! i love family photo time.

May I begin by complimenting your writing — I read Mollygood because your writing style always has me in stitches. I'm a sucker for a knowledgeable vocabulary!

I'm a green-eyed Native American/Irish mix and the question I always get is, "What are you? Italian?" My stomach always does a flip when I tell them what I really 'am' because inevitably, they look visibly disappointed. Awkwardness ensues.

Great comment:-)

Yawn, Yawn, Yawn. Cry me a river. Try being AFrican-American and DARK SKINNED for a day. Tragic mulatto, woe is me. Please.

Cord, I'll say to you what I said to Lauren: righteous piece!

Cord,

I'm a dark-skinned black woman in a relationship with perhaps the whitest man the Midwest has ever birthed. Yours is a story I'm sure our children will become quickly acquainted with as soon as someone else tries to define who they are to them. I hate how some are so willing to nullify YOUR experience as a multiracial black man, but hate when their voices are silenced as "angry" and "too sensitive."

Thanks for sharing just one of many, many experiences of black people in America.

E

You look pretty Black to me, too. I'm from the South, where plenty of Black people (who are also Black-identified) look like you and where plenty look even 'Whiter' than you, so to speak. When I moved to New York, I was really thrown off by everyone's preoccupation with mixed race. I am a light brown-skinned Black girl with fairly kinky, relaxed hair who always thought I looked unmistakably black, but living in NY I get questions all the time in certain social settings as to what my racial mix/background is. It's just so weird to me. In any event, thank you for sharing.

This was a good essay. Very good in fact.

I see plenty of blacks that look like you are are not directly mixed so I can't understand where your confusion comes from.
If I may ask is that your dad in the photo.

When i was an RA at OSU, one of my white male residents asked me if i was mixed (now im straight up chocolate) b/c I didnt look like the black people he had seen on tv. lets just say he was from a vry small town, i believe Lebanon, OH. I think i was the first one he had seen "up close and personal".

This piece I can relate to. I appreciate Cord's writing about such personal and sometimes painful experiences. A couple things come to mind. (a) There are lots of different ways to be Black. Each person is the product of his/her family, experiences, neighborhood, school, country, etc., IN ADDITION TO ethnicity. Ethnicity doesn't make culture on its own. Why we expect all Black people to share the same ways of being is beyond me, when we come from backgrounds as diverse as any other group of people. (b) What is up with the "no, you're not Black enough" posts and the "cry me a river posts?" How can we lack compassion for each other like that? Come on now. There is no question that light-skinned Black people derive some unfair social benefits on the basis of skin color. Even so, the privilege does not invalidate the pain. They coexist.

Sharing is caring …

I feel like the question still remains here though, no? I mean, "are you black enough?" strikes as an understandable question from readers of a blog that taglines with "once you blog black …"

one could argue you needn't necessarily be black to "blog black," i guess, but it's not weird to challenge and/or want to know more about the racial background and disposition of the new editor.

If a "woman" joined a feminist blog and started sanctioning wt t-shirt contests, once could see readers asking if she was "woman," or "feminist" enough to write for the site. That's a dramatization - i presume you havent' been ostensibly sponsoring Pro-White People contests since joining the team - but just to say it's not something to get angry about, especially if you have experience with the vast rangy expanse that is the commenter intellect.

so without further comment from you, cord, that feels a little defensive…

Lauren's bit seems to tell the story of her coming to "own" her racial identity, and all the nuance that entails.

and the same thing w/ Obama's speech, at least in this humble black man's opinion, the key was the ownership of the black experience. It preached universal/human condition while at the same time encouraging the embrace of your signifier, for better and worse.

this strikes as a collection of data points with no current contextualization other than the exploration was triggered by you being asked the same question you've been askd all your life… you don't embrace it, you just show us you're aware.

sooo …. maybe what matters is not if you're black, since that only comes from how people treat/perceive you, but whether you're pro-black or not. whether you identify and relate to "the black experience," in all its anecdotal splendor, enough to embrace it, prmote it, love it.

not saying this represents anyone here, but which editor would be preferred: 1. a white guy all into Af-Am studies, and learning, listening second-handing his knowledge of the black experience and then commenting as judiciously as possible. Or 2. a black guy who has lived the black experience, by default, yet hates or resents that part of himself. Or is at least wildly and paralyzingly conflicted about his "blackness."

is "blackness" just a state of mind? or like a translation of the Animal Farm mxim: all negroes are black, but some are living blacker than others.

not meant to be wholly critical, your candor is awesome, i guess i just wished there was another page …

You sound like you are exactly what you criticize. You stated in 2001, "I join a predominately white fraternity and date some white schoolmates. Soon thereafter, I hear I’ve gotten a nickname among the black students: Incognegro."

So you didn't date any black girls? If so, why didn't you mention it. I don't think just because you have a white mother and a black father that you can't be prejudiced. I think the Black students were keeping it real and it brought up some insecurities and prejudics that you had. Your essay is just another attempt to justify your own prejudices and self hatred.

Cord, you are a brother. The same experiences you had, I can tell you people who consider themselves to be Black, have also had the same experience.

Did you ever associate with other Black people?

Cord:

Great piece, I busted out laughing picturing my life. Comments too vast to list: Oh, you speak so well. Where exactly are you from? What kind of name is that? African (I answered). But you're very light-skinded; I thought all people from Africa are dark skinned like Amistad. That last statement was said to me on my Alma-Mater campus as I waited for the shuttle to take me to another campus for a class. I'm actually born an American.

I've wanted to scream many times, these days I just laugh it off or say something as ridiculous.

I take it back Cord, you are a brother. The Pic up top is proof and you dated white chicks in college..niceee…I'll be your wingman at the spots in BKLYN..a couple nice hipsters…let's go buddy

I am amazed when I look at your life through your writing. Shock and Awe, it's a whole different view than I had! You continue to impress me. Keep it up. XOXO Allison

Cordero, you plagiarist.

1985

• My mother and father stand with me in front of a mirror and let me take in the differences of our tiered bodies and their varied shapes and shades.

This part is lifted almost word for word from Almost White Boy by Willard Motley. Makes me wonder what else you embelished. Like going all the way back to the 1800s to prove you aren't even half black. Unless your paternal grandfather and grandmother were that Native American and ribald (you do understand riblad implies he raped her right?)Buffalo solider, I'm sorry but your pops is just as black as, well the next black guy. One Native American great great great grand parent from the 1800s doesn't cut it when you're trying to fraction off your Blackness, but whatever. We all have our issues.

The lack of tolerance in the US stems not only from the diverse races that live in it — or the dark past from the days of slavery — but the own government's efforts to spawn a homogeneizing culture where everyone is the same.

Everyone is NOT the same, and we must learn to accept and appreciate the diversity. Like Jarabe de Palo says: En lo puro no hay futuro, el futuro esta en la mezcla, que antes que mezcla fue puro.

Cord, you never answered the question. Why didn't you date black girls? Cord, are you a sellout? I know you're a brother…but you said yourself that you dated white girls in college, and didn't even mention black girls. Cord, Cord????

Does it really matter? People have preferences.

Dear Cor'Dell,

I understood everything Boo wrote.
You didn't address the issue.
As Boo stated, your "reflections" from 1985 does read suspiciously close to the passage that was mentioned. "The Almost White Boy" by Willard Motley is a short story found in many writer's compilations from the late '60's -early '70's (The Black Arts Movement Era).

Nella Larson, one of my favorite writers from the Harlem Renaissance,was an outcast because of the belief of her peers that she lifted the works of others and reclaimed the thoughts and experiences as her own. In my opinion, she didn't come nearly as close as you did in your piece regarding your life experiences.

Not to suggest that your experience couldn't have happened just the way you remember it, it's just for me, as well as others I've spoken with regarding this topic, your writing came dangerously close to seeming inauthentic.
Then for you to simply blow Boo off with pathetic and unconnected insults without addressing the queries at hand seemed a little…hmmm…it just seems you protest too much. You came off as tired and not a little bitchy. I'm sure that was not your intent.

You also didn't really respond to "That Girl" whom it appears may started the whole thing by asking a simple question. You accused her of assuming you were somehow unqualified based on race, when she implied nothing of the sort from what I could see.

So I will ask one of her questions again. Why do you seem to only connect your "Blackness" with pain and disappointments. Haven't you discovered the beauty in Blackness, or do you think our grandparents (Those of us who like Zora Neale Hurston and Mos Def are proudly and securely Black on both sides, regardless of whatever racial/ethnic mixtures there may be)do you believe our parents, family and community leaders, were just telling us that shit (Black is Beauty / Wa Tu Wa Zuri…blah,blah,blah…) so we wouldn't feel so bad about being "…just black"?

Please answer the questions without the unnecessary insults about my percieved lack of cultural and/or social exposure or questionable education level. You made this about you, not us, so Man Up and answer the questions.

Peace,

Black on Both Sides,
and Cool with it.

Mr. Jefferson,

Before you get caught up, pull out your red pen and start tripping, I recognize there are typos in my response. Forgive me. Between my haste and overindulgence in "spell check", I flubbed a few lines (Spell check is gonna render us all retarded!)… Please respond to the essence of the questions,and try not to get conveniently hung up on historical, grammatical and spelling errors.

P.S.
For the reCORD:

Honestly, it doesn't hurt me if you choose to date whitewomen. Obviously and blessedly, a caring woman chose to have and raise you and your siblings and I'm not mad at her or you for that. I encourage and support any Sista that works to sucessfully raise any child to adulthood. It makes sense to be attracted to what has sustained you. I don't have a dog in that fight(forgive me for that lapse, Michael Vick).

Peace,

My Momi AND My Daddie Love me,
Wit' my Blakself!
Bought me a t-shirt
that read :
"When GOD made Black Children,
He was SHOWING OFF!!"

I cannot find it - but I think Obama said he's black b/c of his experience in America not b/c of his actual racial make-up. He said something to the effect of when I walk into a upscale store I'm followed by security b/c they see me as black, not as a man with a kenyan father and a white mother. There is validity in that statement. Quite frankly, I'd rather be asked "what are you?" by a black person than pulled over while driving black. One comes from curiosity the other comes from hate. You can call yourself whatever you want; however, your experiences are more reflective of the "black" American experience.

Last Postscript from me on this particular subject(I hope…)

Because it appears that there are so many who seem to ascribe to and identify with the
"Being Black is like a bad cup of coffee" ideal (bitter and strong), I must clarify at least one of my quotes.
I can't begin to assume ANYTHING where the
"What did I do to be so black and blue?" Crowd is concerned. That seems to me to be how all of this shit started in the first place,one writer quite possibly and negatively assuming and then projecting onto what another writer or writers' meant based on his own prism on racial/social status and what it may mean to another.
For example, the writers who penned response # 19 That Girl, # 64 Well-Noted or # 69 Boo to just to name a few come to mind for me.
I may not wholly agree with any of them, however their questions seem valid to me and worthy of a introspective response.
I'm no Iyanla VanZant or Tyra Banks, but I think the original writer may have publicly revealed a little more of his linen than he may have intended.

My Momi and Daddie told me if a person's responses in a discussion or debate with you seem inappropriate,out of line, out of touch or just plain WACK as far as the perceived stream of thought would normally lead to as far as conclusions go, one has to assume the other person isn't responding to you at all, but to some other earlier unresolved experience that your current discourse with them has dredged up. That, or they are just trying to throw you off your square with some lame-ass bullshit.

At any rate, the quote I want to clarify in my original text (response #74) is
"Black is BEAUTIFUL / Wa Tu Wa Zuri…"

You, Fair Reader, will receive two thousand and eight (2008)honorary "All the Way Down Cool" points if you can identify the origin and correct response to the last part of that quote!
Life Time Achievement/ All Time High Score if you can name where and when it was first launched into the national Black lexicon.

Please find and share with your friends and loved ones Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s speech that he gave on September 1st 1967 in D.C. to the American Association of Psychiatry (or some such org.) regarding the violence in America and it's correlation to the Vietnam War.

Today we will be awashed( some us held down and drowned) in his thoughts and words that the Machine that works tirelessly to destroy us have twisted nearly beyond recognition in order to disarm us and lull us to sleep and "…dream today."

Peace Cuzins.
Thank U 2 those who induldged me and read what I had to say, whether U agreed or not.
Again, please forgive any errors. Charge it 2 my Head and not my Heart.

Say it Loud,
I'm BLACK and
I'm Proud!!

It's Nation Time!

Free The Land!

On The Move!

In a word: proud.

Bravo Lauren, bravo!

cord you look so cute in that baby pic on page 2

i can't believe how people bash you on here, when you have opened up so personally to us all. i sure as heck wouldn't be brave enough to post my pictures and racist encounters on the world wide web!!

your encounter with the rogue cop happens a whole lot where i'm from, in cali.

finally, great response lauren!

Tres Bien, Soeur Lauren de Guillaume.

Mon mal!! Il fait frais. J'concider.

As a beloved Tante' of mine was fond of saying, "Chein qui aboie ne mord pas." or "Un coup chien sera hurleur!". So with that, I will cease barking and snapping at Cord Jefferson's heels.

U hit the nail squarely on the head.
I wanted to like him more. However, once sensing (or dare I admit, ASSUMING }~:) from the verbal snapshot he shared with us, he probably wouldn't like me or my "kind", so I attacked back.
I still stand firmly with what I've previously written. However, I must concede your point.

What IS it that I REALLY wanted, huh? Hmmm… Maybe some weirdly reworked revision of the "How to Sell-out and Live with it" scene from the Last Act of Loraine Hansberry's "A Raisin in the Sun", perhaps? The scene in which Walter Lee shares with his family his hard earned, pessimistic view where he declares there's only two kinds of people in the world - the Takers and those who get took.
A view hammered into his psyche by the World and people he once called "friends".
Did I envision or wish for Cord 2 verbally fall 2 his knees and re-enact Walter Lee's "Hey Mr. Charlie, Oh Great White Father…" speech, substituting with "What up, Queenmother Nzingah-Shaniquah, Oh Great Black Mother/Goddess…"? NO.
But I did hope 4 a concession of his own.
At least an admission that perhaps he,too, read more into what was written 2 him, then applied a negative connotation where none existed until he himself introduced it.

Yeah … I wanted to like him more.
Although I've been made quite aware that my like or dislike of Cord Jefferson doesn't sign his
paychecks,neither does my "like" seem desired nor required by him, shouldn't it be about more than just that?

For the record, I believe E Pluribus Unum is one of the things about our People that make us so deep, different and striking. I think it's this quality that gives us what my Dad calls " Our natural PIZZAZ…!"

I was raised Multiculturally in general, and Africentrically in particular, long before there were buzz phrases coined for it. So how or why would I have a problem with another's origin? How could I? They have no more control over to whom they were born than I had.

The problem may have been that it's not always easy to react empathetically or sympathetically when viewing someone else's wounds.
Doing so may unintentially and unknowingly cause one's own wounds to begin to throb or leak themselves.

I'm going to close on this note, seeing as my vision may be a bit impaired due to this maple tree branch that appears 2 be growing out of my eye.

I will, Soeur, work to get over myself, as well as continue to work on healing my own racially infected Boo-boo's. I truly wish the same for Cord and the rest of our community. I look forward to hanging out peacefully in your World and playing well with others. I haven't mastered that yet.
See you around.

Again, thanks 4 having and indulging me. I'll TRY 2 keep it short and simple from now on. (~:

Sincerly Submitted.

Fade 2 Black

Lauren, no one cares about your "rescue me" diatribe. He put his essay out there, and we responded to it. GET OVER IT! Cord, doesn't want to answer certain questions because he still has some unresolved issues hence the release of his essays…particularly the ridiculous April 4, 2008 essay about his dating practices. Cord, knows the truth, and the truth of the matter is, he doesn't date black girls. He is exactly what he criticizes in others. The black students who called him out were right.

Cord,

Spare us your ridiculous long rants. You actually used the "there are black people here" argument. NEGRO, GET THE FILL IN THE BLANK OUT OF HERE. You just think white women look better or should I say, light, bright and almost white look beter…I had to put that in there before Cord pulled a Taye Diggs move with the "I have dated a black woman uh sort of she was mixed" like Taye Diggs did. Cord, you remind me of my Uncle Clarence Tom. Lol!

One of my best friends was confronted in a bar one night by a drunk girl who said "You are SO white!" like it was a compliment. And it was a comment he'd heard way too many times before. So he replied "What? Just because I'm college-educated, don't speak ebonics, don't wear my pants around my ass, and prefer Dave Matthews Band to Snoop Dogg I'm inherently less black?" He said he was more offended by that than he was the few times in his life that someone had called him by the N word.

cord, that is great writing, excellent observations and vivid commentary. i too get strange inquiries about my race, but from the opposite perspective. I look so damn Anglo, yet i have tan skin living in FL. WHen I go visit home in VA people question my ethnicity, do you have any italian in you? anglo-saxism is a litmus test in the old gentile southern cities.

This is beautiful, Cord. I've only begun to think critically about issues of race and identity over the last few years, mostly because of experiences from law school. I wish I had been more cognizant of the lack of diversity of our college when we were there. Thanks for writing this. I learned a lot from it.